So You Think You Can Dance Canada - Top 12 (2x14, 2x15)

Since I missed the top 14, when I got around to watching the top 12, I was more than a little aghast to hear Leah say that Natalie had already been eliminated. It's bad enough that she's not in the competition anymore, I didn't even get to see Natalie solo. Her krump solo. This is like Canada's way of getting back at me for comparing my sparsely attended live chats for SYTYCD US season 6 to Our Northern Cousins.

Dear Hosers,
I've learned my lesson. If in the future I proctor another unpopulated chat of barren and empty whiteness, I'll compare it to Alaska.

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Jean-Marc? More like Come-On Généreux. This guy is like a robot with Tourette's.

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"Glory Box" is at once an obvious Portishead track to choose and a rather inapt track, especially for a vampire-themed routine. For the menacing, predatory (pseudo-)goth vibe that Melanie and Cody's routine called for, "Cowboys," "Seven Months," or "Elysium." (Yes, those three songs are all from the self-titled album, which is secretly the best Portishead album.)

And if we're adamant about an obvious Portishead song, then why not "The Rip"? (Which has a stunning video, besides.)

Indie rating: Portishead - "Western Eyes"