Sunday, April 22, 2012

America's Next Top Model: British Invasion (Cycle 18) - 18x07 "Estelle"

Clearly, not much happens that requires extensive scrutiny, mostly because everyone's been expecting the episode's most noteworthy development -- Kyle's elimination -- for weeks now. What's more, it happens in the least dramatic way possible: a normal exit because of a weak photo (also, she's on the short-end of the show's institutional investment in her bottom 2 competition, Alisha). In fact, the most standout thing from this episode is Kyle's completely creepy clapping:

But, as I mentioned in my last post, I was looking forward to seeing the Brits wallow in their victory, and lo and behold, they're rewarded with some corny tchotchkes.

Imagine my disappointment -- for starters, it's completely the wrong color! But no worries, on the internet, anything is possible:

Add a TARDIS whirr at your own discretion, though Annaliese looks already properly gobsmacked without the audio effects.

The English victory lets Alisha speak again, since she'd previously resolved herself to a vow of silence until she received a first call-out, but when the result is blather like this...
... I rather prefer when she was struggling to break through the glass ceiling. That said, we're apparently going to see Alisha's narrative fully coalesce around the notion that she has trouble being in front of a camera that doesn't capture motion or when she's front and center as the object of focus.

In other pathological developments, we discover why Laura makes all those weird faces in her video:

She made a face when she was a kid and it really did stick. And here she is as a young girl, gasp, smoochie tooching:

Tyra has a lot to teach her, yet all would be forgivable if not for the fact that Laura's crimping her hair again.

Seeing those nasty waves puts me in a firing mood, which is my way of inelegantly transitioning to the news that the J's and Nigel are not returning next cycle, and in the spirit of house-cleaning, I hope that Kelly Cutrone follows them soon.

To varying degrees, they've all got their shortcomings, though I'll add that after 9 years, I think I may finally be appreciating Ms. J now that his role has shrunken so dramatically. Nigel has earned a reputation on the show for being thin-skinned, but aside from the occasional confrontations over sticks and bottoms and whatnot, he's hardly worth jettisoning unless you happen to want to make a personnel decision for the sake of personnel decisions. As for Jay Manuel... well, I'll only say that with the show having an opening for creative director, Game can finally step in as a full-time contributor and not just a dreamy, one-time special guest judge.

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