The Boston Rob and Amber SEX TAPE

Not really.

But anyway, let's break things down.

Rob: the main reason for my enmity for him was the incessant high school-era jockism that he exuded. Not merely his physical prowess at the challenges, but he also got the girl and masterminded just about every notable happening in the game -- and he didn't bother trying to be modest about it. Further, after that one brief moment where he displayed vulnerability during his separation from Amber, he erased whatever hints of humility by dismissing that moment as all part of his strategy. That untouchable, gloating aura easily raised my ire to the point that I reveled in the bloodshed at tribal council. (If I had been on the jury, I would've told him straight up that I believed he deserved (and I use the term loosely -- nobody actually deserves to win $1 million) to win, but that I was going to vote for Amber anyway.)

And despite all my antipathy, I ultimately had a modicum of respect for the jerk. For all his haughtiness, he showed remorse for what he did (and Jenna L., for all her lip-flapping, was right in that the way he played doesn't have to be a source of shame -- in order to win nowadays, broken alliances are inevitable) and throughout the show maintained a level of articulation I didn't expect from a construction worker. So in the end, respect.

Amber, meanwhile, gave either stock, repetitive or irrelevant answers in her interviews/jury questioning. She absolutely rode Rob's coattails, and at least in the way the show was edited, her contributions to the couple, strategy-wise, were negligible and Rob didn't speak up because, well, you don't talk like that about your fiancée.

Rupert's "Hey, it's just a game, be yourself, whatever" attitude was refreshing to see, though I have to remember how upset he was at Lil last season, and so his mellowness surely had something to do with what he viewed as loyalty; Lil voted against him without telling him, whereas Jenna said that she might. In fact, perhaps Jenna and Rupert were the two of the three who voted for him because they happened to be brought along and not have their alliances broken, i.e. if Rob spun enough alliances, there was bound to be someone who felt that he "honored" them.

Shii-Ann stole my jury question! (Which was to name reasons why the other person deserves to win.)

Finally, Tom's psyche/"Don't be stupid, stupid" was deliciously juvenile. Like I said, I was in the mood for bloodshed.

The after party -- boy!

Tom acquitted himself dreadfully. Like Alicia, he seemed to believe that lying wouldn't occur with his alliance with Rob. He continued to harp on handshake deals in the reunion, then began to back-track in front of the audience where he intimated that the only issue at odds between them, the one apology that would right things between them was to apologize about calling his son Bucky Bo an idiot. Not to mention that it was wholly expected of him, making the whole thing anti-climactic.

Lex similarly fared poorly. He came off as an equivocating hypocrite, but even so, I can't summon any ill-will for him, if only because he's one of the more literate people on the show, and that he's a semi-local boy.

Jerri got a raw deal with the booing, and with respect to the rowdy, rude audience, she and Richard Hatch were very spot on about viewers forgetting that the contestants were actual people and not characters who exist in the confines of a television box.

Hatch quietly impressed me too, in that he dropped his usual bravado and made very cogent remarks. He is thick-skinned and so enjoys cultivating his horrible image, but others who came off roughly because they have short tempers or run their mouths a lot aren't consciously intent on being a jerk. Not to say that I'd get along with them if I were thrown in close quarters (or vice versa), but getting your intimate moments televised isn't something I have to put up with; and Shii-Ann's statement about glass houses applies perfectly to those hecklers.