YOU HAVE MY WORD! 24 Fantasy League Analysis
Yet another boner-filled episode, which you really can't have this late into primetime.
Vladimir Bierko - Got to talk this week! Swoon-worthy scar adds extra HOTT SAUCE to his already all-business manliness. Rrowr!
Karen Hayes - She finally has something to show for her butchy, authoritative demeanor. Not any old person (old!) can get away with telling Jack to shut up. Karen even has what looks like a new boytoy in Buchanan. Playa!
Christopher Henderson - He has Jack's word!
Jack Bauer - What a Kobe-esque disappearance in crunchtime. When he began punching random CTU/Homeland guards and threatening his teammates (e.g. Miles Papazian), a lot of Jack apologists tried to justify this behavior as his unorthodox way of firing up his team. (Next thing you know, his pet cougar is going to maul Kim and he'll just shrug it off as "caca happening.") Even if you grant the apologists this interpretation, Jack did it in the beginning of the episode when it mattered least. When it mattered most, Jack showed that he was ill-prepared (not bothering to find out what Henderson's gameplan was) and slow on the uptake (not realizing that Bierko was going to use the Sentox on the submarine crew).
Aaron Pierce - If he's loyal to David Palmer (i.e. a person, not the position of POTUS), then he's not a very good Secret Service agent.
Miles "Choking the" Papazian - As if it wasn't already obvious that he and Karen Hayes had something going on, she slapped him like the hussy she is.
Next column: 5-7 a.m.
Previous column: 3 a.m.
Indie rating: Solex - "That's What You Get With People Like That on Cruises Like These..."