Tuesday, November 29, 2005

America's Next Top Model (Cycle 5) - 5x10 "The Girl Who Retaliates"

I think that I can give up all hope of doing accurate rankings, and from now till the end of this cycle, I'm just going to rank them on how much I like them and their personalities, because clearly, Tyra et al are working hard to be unpredictable, making head-scratching, sometimes illogical decisions to stay one step ahead of viewers. So there's no point trying to handicap the girls anymore. I tip my hat to you, Ms. Banks.

As for the episode: I feel kind of vindicated that I stuck to my guns in regards to Kim and kept her from the top two spots in my rankings when all the judges suddenly decided to all but give her a free pass to the top two. (Never you mind that I let Kim rise one spot to third, never you mind.) (I need to be right for once.) I'd also like to say that I always knew that Bre would let out her big time diva because of all the trash she's been saying about the other girls during her candids. (But only retrospectively.)

And speaking of Bre, she spoon-fed me the delicious, creamy drama this episode. Sure, it was childish "You took my stuff now I take your stuff" blather, but the consequences were nuclear -- this is why I love reality tv.

Finally, I don't think I'm the only who couldn't stop staring at Mr. Jay's cleavage.

1. Nik (1) Awesome pic! The big hair is a nice touch.
2. Nicole (4) Wow! She made the final four! Dentists everywhere rejoice. Funny thing is, although most of her pictures feature the same, dewy-eyed look, her face is ultra-expressive when she's not posing.
3. Bre (2) My brain tells me that Bre will undergo an overnight personality transplant that only the judges will see, but which enables her to reach the final two. My heart wants Nicole to make it.
4. Jayla (5) 'Tude is only tolerable if you can work it like Bre.

Previous Cycle 5 Rankings
5x09 Baby-Got-Backness
5x08 Pissness
5x07 Pin-Upness

5x06 Bubbleness
5x05 Power Rankings
5x04 Relative Worth
5x03 Rantness
5x01 Stankness

Indie rating: Jesu - "Man Woman"


Anonymous said...

You're stylin'. You may just be UCBerkeley's Next Top Model.


Anonymous said...

Oh. And I thought your posting was titled, "The Girl Who Retails." But instead, judging by your merch, it's "The Blogger Who Retails."