Monday, December 12, 2005

America's Next Top Model (Cycle 5) - 5x12 "The Girl On The Cover"

Honest, I have a good reason for not posting on the finale sooner. That was a weak finale is why!


1. The editing was absolutely strange, cutting to reaction shots of people who neither had reason to react to certain events, nor actual reactions to those events.

2. The wonky editing possibly was an effort to stir up the drama of the episode, because, considering what was aired, the episode was flat, especially if you compare it to, oh, just about every other finale that Top Model has had. Maybe because Nik seemed so guaranteed to win, that the actual, rather un-prepared for revelation that Nicole, in all her toothy glory, was AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL.

I think that my lukewarm attitude demonstrates how much a show needs to have not simply a source of conflict and antagonism, but a coherent heel who is present for an extended part of the season. And maybe not just an extended part of the season -- a season is best served if that heel sticks around through at least the penultimate episode. Lisa's bizarre behavior was both entertaining and a consistent source of conflict on the show, but she was unexpectedly eliminated relatively early in the season. Her villains-in-waiting -- Jayla and Bre -- were both defanged (either through editing or being tired of internecine drama in the show). In particular, Bre was a genuine bad girl for only one episode, and then everything was chills between her and Nicole.

Nevertheless, there were two appealing things about the episode.

1. I was heartened to hear Nicole say that she embraced her inner dork, for how long then will she embrace this dork?

2. One of the judges, I think Twig, said that Nik posed from head to toe. Well! On that catwalk, her boobs were working it, too!

I would go for a complete rundown of all the girls, but I'm not motivated enough to do that now. Perhaps in the future.

Complete Cycle 5 Rankings
5x11 Pillness
5x10 Retaliatory
5x09 Baby-Got-Backness
5x08 Pissness
5x07 Pin-Upness

5x06 Bubbleness
5x05 Power Rankings
5x04 Relative Worth
5x03 Rantness
5x01 Stankness

Indie rating: Mogwai - "We're No' Here"

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